Whoa! Another Show With Cisco Adler!

You may remember Cisco Adler for a few things: his artistic abilities, his modeling skills, or his band, Whitestarr. No matter how you choose to engrave his image(s) into your mind, you know who he is.

But now....So does MTV! Riding high on his previous success from that song "Buzzin," Schwayze is out and about in the throes of California sunshine, girls, and um...did I say sunshine, with his best friend and boyfriend Cisco Adler. Together, they encounter CRAZY people, do CRAZY things, and embark on CRAZY adventures. Gather round kids, as MTV tells you how it's gonna go down...

The aptly titled reality series Buzzin' chronicles Shwayze's comical misadventures as he tries to navigate his way through the music industry and make a name for himself with Cisco and tour Manager Wareen by his side. Struggling to keep them in check are Suretone Records head honcho Jordan Schur, who made artists like Ashlee Simpson and Limp Bizket household names, assistant David Patton, tour manager Warren, and new-media guru Cat Lake. Together, the wild bunch embarks on a long, winding road to reach the top of the charts.

As Shwayze and Cisco Adler ride the wave of success with "Buzzin'" and embark on a journey of a lifetime, there'll be plenty of candid moments, crazy parties and hilarious hijinks. From video shoots and live performances to beautiful girls and fridges full of beer, the dynamic duo will encounter it all.

See? It's like Stand By Me, only in Malibu, with slutty women, lots of money, and the occasional one night stand.

Wait...did I say occasional? I mean, habitual one night stands. I can't wait to see what kind of Dukes Of Hazard style hijinks these two crazy kids will get into! Haha, be sure to watch. Because you will be the only one.

Here's the song, y'know, so you can see just why they NEED to make a show about these two.

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The show airs on July 23rd, at 10 pm. Please make other plans.

Deuces,
Erika

The Happening Is NOT Happening

I repeat: The Happening is NOT happening. I made the mistake of going tonight, opening night, to see this movie. I saw the 10:30 showing because the earlier show sold the fuck out before we could even get to the theatre.

Anyway, after standing in the ticket line forever and getting "Umbrella" sung to me by some random dude peddling party fliers and calling me Rihanna (grrrrr), we finally got our tickets for a show that wouldn't start for half an hour so we meandered over to CPK to get some food. While waiting for our takeout, we saw this girl, or maybe woman, anyhow, this chick just sitting all alone at her table. All fucking alone. In a busy, bustling restaurant filled with hearty, friendly banter and waiters laughing with each other and managers flitting around happily. This girl was all alone. Eating her bowl of pasta and trying to distract from the fact that she was by herself by intermittently looking around and checking her cell. My boyfriend and I kept hoping someone would come to her table, whoever she was waiting for, or a friend or her man, but no one came. She had two bowls of pasta and then paid her check and left. It was one of the saddest things I've seen, but I've certainly fucking been there before.

So back to The Happening. OK. Terrible. No, HORRENDOUS. Firstly, it's not scary. Secondly, it's hella gory. And people are dying all over the place. I couldn't handle all the violent innuendo. I was totally doing the peeking through two fingers thing. And the movie goes nowhere. To be fair though, it didn't really start anywhere. I don't want to give away the ending, but this whole thing centers around evil plants, kay? That's why dude threw himself under a lawnmower. 'Cause of a plant. Look, just don't waste your money on this movie.

You'll only be paying for M. Night Shyamalan's summer home in the Poconos.

Deuces,
Erika

PS: Zooey Deschanel, while a gorgeous indie music darling, cannot act for shit. Kthxbai.

WTF.

What the fuck is this?



I mean, I know what it is, but for goodness sakes. Really?

Plz Don't Get Silly

This is stupid. And silly. And completely, unabashedly ridic. I hate it. I want to dance to it. I am mildly conflicted, and agitated that Soulja Boy is gaining enough clout in the industry to help other people make dumb ass songs and videos. It's unsettling. Collipark you are (a little) better than this. You had Ying Yang Twins and Young Jeezy for a minute, so you can (kind of) do it right...You can judge it for yourself. It's worse than Tyga.

Actually, it makes Tyga look like T.I. Scary! I saw this on...where? Sucker Free Countdown. Why? Look for the Flavor Flav remix.



It hurts. Viscerally. I promise ATL has better hip hop than this. Really! I'm gonna go sulk at Club Crunk.

Deuces,
Erika

Oh No She Did!

I don't know why it took me so long to see this, but it did. This is worse than Yelle and CSS combined. It's like Uffie meets Peewee's Playhouse.



robyn: "konichiwa bitches"

Why?

Deuces,
Erika

Thx But No Thx

Once, I liked Gym Class Heroes. It was circa their first album. I saw them live, when the Tournado tour came to the Arena, and I thought Travis was uber sexy. At least his voice was. Then I saw an interview with Travvy on MTV and I fell out of love very quickly.

Anyway, this backstory is just to preface my hate and supreme dislike for his li'l cuz Tyga, who now has that ridiculous single "Coconut Juice" on Sucker Free on MTV2. Now don't get me wrong, I know Sucker Free isn't exactly a paradigm for real, true hip hop, but I mean, this song?

Not to mention the video is all wrong. There are some white hoes shaking asses in their corner, plenty of post-fab hipsters, and that annoying Tyga looks like he bought his whole wardrobe at Urban Outfitters. Not to mention Travis is tossing lines in. And there's a cameo from Pete Wentz, who, might I add, said, "This is Encino, not Compton."

What is that supposed to mean?! Suddenly Wentz listens to to Jay-Z and suddenly he can participate in economic and demographical stereotypes? I don't think so.

Whatevs. Maybe in ten years this will be like Will Smith circa "Willenium." I hope so.

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Deuces!
Erika