This Week On The Music Front

Ugh, it's Sunday. Normally this would make me so bored and stir crazy I would want to scoop out my eyeballs and eat them with fava beans, but with all the shit that went down this week, this Sunday was a godsend. Plus I definitely had things to look forward to today.

This was a more interesting week for music, Lollapalooza actually notwithstanding. Although it did provide good amounts of interesting stories, pictures, and a big cup of Chi-town haterade for me to sip on. Here's the rundown on everything.

TTFN & CUL8R BYOP

Yes it's true kiddos. Be Your Own Pet is no more. You feel like the longer you pay attention to music, its scene, and the outcome, these kinds of things should not bother you anymore. But as I have followed BYOP since their inception and own all but one of their LPs, CDs, and EPs, this really gets me. Some say it was because they were running into issues with their Get Awkward release, namely censorship problems, but some blamed it on their signing to a big label, Universal, or because they pulled out of the Warped Tour lineup. Whatever it was, it does mean that Jemina and Co. aren't starting any more food fights, telling bitches to leave, or kicking ass at the Dude Zone anytime soon. *Tear slowly rolls down cheek* I hear there are going to be some spinoff bands but NOTHING will be like BYOP. Thank god I got to see them when they opened up for the Arctic Monkeys two years ago.

NME TRIES TO TELL THE US WHY WE'RE COOL AGAIN

This ish went down like tranqqued up grizzly from a treelimb. According to NME, we (America) were cool once, then stopped being cool, and now, thanks to 25 new bands, are offish cooler than the other side of the pillow. And while the editors can acknowledge that we have an underground scene like no other, these bands (read:the ones they picked randomly out of assrtd issues of Paste, Fader, Spin, and Filter) are suddenly making us really legit again. Because uh yeah, before Vampire Weekend, we were just a wasteland. This is the list of bands. Try not to get too angry. Or maybe get angry, and go tell other people what you think:

01 Vampire Weekend

02 Lil Wayne

03 Glass Candy

04 Kings Of Leon

5 MGMT

06 Spank Rock

07 TV On The Radio

08 Boy Crisis

09 Black Kids

10 Holy Ghost Revival

11 The Hold Steady

12 Fleet Foxes

13 Amazing Baby

14 Jay Reatard

15 HEALTH

16 The Cool Kids

17 Black Lips

18 Yo Majesty

19 White Denim

20 Telepathe

21 Iglu and Hartly

22 Chester French

23 Girl Talk
24 TheDeathSet

25 Grace Jones

Like, rly? Girl Talk is that far down? And White Denim? And TVOtR wasn't making us cool back when they actually put out an album? Glass Candy certainly deserves to be that high on the list, but, who put this ish together?

CHESTER FRENCH TALKS TO ME IN WARM, FRIENDLY TONES

I left a comment on Stereogum dealing with all this NME nonsense. Here it is, in full verbatim fashion:

Firstly, good music really is just that. Good music. It comes from Britain and America AND the rest of the UK. Like, Frightened Rabbit are amazing and they're Scottish. Oh yeah, and it DEFINITELY comes from Canada. Stars? The Guest Bedroom? Pony Up? Yes please! Oh yeah, and the Leeds music scene is killing it right now. It deserves something of a recognition since it somehow manages to create a barrier against the shitty typical shetpile of the normal music scene. Oh yeah, and Los Campesinos! Yes please! But keep in mind that NME is the equivalent of a fifteen year old's self published zine. It's whatever music they like...uh,and whoever's show they have a press badge for. I met the dude in TheDeathSet...that band is like Australian. And why are Black Kids and VW so high on that list...because they sound British? Glass Candy pwns and so does Jay Reatard and the Black Lips. But NME did acknowledge that there is a significant underground scene in NY and LA (although those of Philly, Chicago, Atlanta, and Seattle are equally noteworthy), they just choose to ignore it. Whatev. Americans may have had their fill of these bands (Chester French...sigh, whatev), but they're like still hitting the other side of the pond, no? Like Pokemon! But not with Japan, with the UK...okay, so not like Pokemon.

Then I checked my email. I received this message from DA Wallach of Chester French. First I got worried. I get in too much trouble for the things I say on the internet. When that happens, I take a deep breath and ask myself, "What would Sarah Morrison do?" This time I didn't have to:

Hey Erika-

I saw your comment on the stereogum blog where you mention our group, Chester French. I hope no one's had their fill of us yet, since the album isn't even out, but I definitely want to win you as a fan. If you send me your mailing address back I'll mail you a special edition package of our single and shall be sure to get you a copy of the album when it finally sees the light of day! Hope you're having a great weekend.

D.A.

Normally I'd get psuedo-frustrated for people taking the things I say too seriously, but this guy was just tooooo sweet to get angry at. That's Chester French for you, I guess.

All up in ur emale, leevin u messagez.

NEW VIVIAN GIRLS SONG

Someone actually compared them to a crappier version of the Pipettes. I hope she never goes on to have a music journalism career. If she does, it will probably be writing for NME. The Vivian Girls are hot awesomeness from Brooklyn. They're an all girl band that makes muddy and/or raw rock music. It's great. They're great. They just released a new song from their S/T LP called "Where Do You Run To?" and it's sort of good. Play it on a cool, sunny Autumn day, enjoy your tea, and try to figure out the fastest way to get that still sleeping one night stand out of your bed and into a taxi. Uhhh..."I know it's eight in the morning on a Wednesday, but I have to go to church now..."

Vivian Girls: "Where Do You Run To?"

As you can see, it's obvi been a busy week for everyone. In other news (ION is going to be the new abreev for that saying, so you know for future ref), Jessica Fletcher's badass friend Mistress Viviane has a new column going on Single Scoop about "the realities of sex." It's really good and worth reading, because we've all had these bedroom bafflers at least once.

And in case you missed it, Adult Swim ran an Old School night on Friday where they showed old episodes of the shows that originally made AS so fantastic: Sealab 2021, The Brak Show, Home Movies, Space Ghost, etc. What is even more fantastic is that I remember all of those shows. Mid 90's born Hannah Montana tweens? You ain't got shit on me! It was also V's birthday on Friday, the 1st of Aug, so Alex, if you catch my girl on the streets, take her by the hand and buy her a cupcake. Jess Fletch can surely recommend you some good places to go. And now the "p" key on my laptop is stuck. Great.

eace easy eo le,

Erika

Why I Hate Rock Band

Everyone I know is aware that I hate Rock Band. I do. I kind of really mind Guitar Hero too, but that's more like karoake and Pump to me, so it doesn't really get under my skin. But for some reason, Rock Band really gets me going. First off, I hate those commercials. They try to be funny and sarcastic and clever and all that, but they're lost on me. I know what they're about, but they're stupid.

But I won't continue to talk about adverts forever.

My boyfriend thinks my hate of RB is elitist. Fuck that. You know what, I probably am. When I was in 10th grade, all I wanted was a drum kit. I'd played the flute in MS band for three years (but never got any better) and then took piano lessons under this strict and stringent teacher who never let me paint or grow out my nails. It was boring, but I am an ace pianist.

Anyway, I bought my first drums from Goodwill. It was $25 for four drums that were missing a lot of parts and were pretty crappy, but I sat on my floor and learned them. I bought a ten dollar TEACH YOURSELF DRUMS book. My first pair of sticks were the shittiest ones ever and only cost about three bucks. But day in and day out, I sat in front of those drums and practiced.

Cut to about six months later. My friends and I think it would be cool to start an all girl band. We have two garage sales and raise around $120. With the money we buy an amp, a guitar, and a mic. Then we try to build me a complete drum kit. It's hella expensive. I plead to my mother and she finally buys me a kit about two months later. It becomes my pride and joy. Continuous trips to Guitar Center ensue. I feel empowered when I buy my sticks. I ogle hot boy drummers.

A year and two defunct riot grrrl bands later, I still practice the drums everyday. I am sad to put them in storage when I go to LA. The most wonderful thing that has happened in my drumming career is when I saw this man drumming on an upside down bucket on the street in Atlanta. He was amazing.

I approached him and asked him how long he was playing. He said, "For a really long time." I said, "I've been playing for about a year and I feel like I'm not getting any better."

He said to me, "Keep going. I'm sure you'll get really good."

You don't get that kind of organic, interesting, awesome story from asking your mom to go to Target and buy you Rock Band. You don't get this feeling of accomplishment of learning an instrument from square one and then getting really good at it. You feel like you can conquer the fucking world with that feeling. I don't dismiss the fact that Rock Band gives a lot of people the chance to come out of their shells. I just wonder why people can't just buy a real instrument and do that.

I guess the world likes the instant gratification. Bleh, that's why I hate Rock Band.

Deuces,
Erika

Being Josh Homme

It sure looks like it ain't easy. Also looks like it ain't anything new. At the Queens of the Stone Age show in Oslo, a disgruntled Norwegian threw random shit at Josh Homme. He is fucking pissed.

This is fucking hilarious.



Sounds like Homme should try doing a Kanye next time.

Deuces,
Erika

Lily Allen Speaks Out Against Perez Hilton's Meanie McMeaniness. This Just In: She Also Learns To Use Photoshop

Okay, so Perez Hilton may not be the nicest dude. Well, he isn't. Plain and simp. But little did he know that mussing with Miss Allen would lead to a fiery wrath in the form of mature words, a Myspace blog, and some comma splices. Let's watch.

(from LA's blog)

I don't know why this has annoyed me so much. If I'm honest, it's probably because part of it is true these days I am more known for being a train wreck than a musician, and it does hurt. I've been working really hard on my new record; I don't think it sucks by the way. I haven't released a record for two years, so it's totally understandable that people don't write about my music anymore, however it's not fair to say that I'm washed up and it's not fair to make up these feuds between people. Not everyone's lives are fuelled by egos and jealousy, mine is certainly not. There was a time when Amy came out, that I was a little jealous, she has an amazing voice and writes incredible songs, what singer wouldn't be a little jealous of that, but I'd never let those feelings become unhealthy. And this is not meant in any way but I'd never heard of Katy Perry before I came here a few days ago, I didn't even know she was on Capitol, who by the way are not my label. I am signed to Regal Records in the UK and Capitol distributes my records here in America. I don't feel like I've been shoved aside for anyone, I haven't got a record out yet, so why would anyone be focusing their energies on me when there's nothing to work on! I have never been a "golden girl" and I think I visited Capitols office in New York once, about a year a half ago. I very much doubt they had a picture of me in their lobby. The point I'm trying to make is these stories are just not true. If the word reportedly exists in a story it means that it's pretty much a lie, it means they can't prove what they're writing and their just covering their backs. Perez doesn't even do this he just writes things that aren't true with no shame about it, and it's sad. I read these posts on his website about anti – bullying campaigns and all these good causes, and while I used to enjoy reading his site it seems to me that recently he has become what he hates so much, a bully. He bullies young, successful females; people usually bully people they're jealous of so I'll let you come to your own conclusion on that one. Anyway, I've got nothing against Perez personally, I don't assume to know him, what I do know is this though, he has a HUGE crush on my old manager, who I fired with a few months ago. Maybe this is his way of getting his attention or in his good books, or maybe it's because I turned down the opportunity of going on his TV show when he asked me to, or maybe because I'm friends with Samantha Ronson , who is so lovely by the way and not what Perez makes her out to be, who knows? Anyways, I hope you'll all like my new material, if not, looks like I'll have to find something else to do.

Who could have seen that coming? (Stevie Wonder, perhaps?) Kudos to Lily for keeping it hella real. Realer than that Hot Topic poser Perez. Now how did this ish get started? Because Mr. Hilton thought it would be cute to post this little gem:

And the battle is on! It's hard to stay on top in the music industry. Just ask Lily Allen! Lily used to be Capitol Records' "golden girl" but lately she's just been slipping. She's known these days more fore being a tragic train wreck than a musician. She knows it too. That must hurt! And, now, it seems she's been replaced. Replaced by none other than a Perez fad, Katy Perry, which we first introduced you to last year. Katy also performed at our kick ass party in Austin during SXSW this past March. Well, according to reports, a music industry insider has said, "Lily Allen is peeved at Capitol. She feels like they've shoved her aside to focus all their energies on their new girl of the moment, Katy Perry." But the real insult, according to the source, came when the label "replaced a photo of Lily Allen with one of Katy Perry" in its office main lobby. Ha ha ha!!!!! Lily is starting to look like washed-up goods. The only thing that can save Allen now???? If she makes a good sophomore album! But, from what we're hearing, Lily's new material s-u-c-k-s.

In addition to the snazzy retort on Lily's side, someone taught her how to Photoshop, creating this adorable pic she's daring Perez to post up on his site. Oooh...sounds like middle school all over again!
Hmmmm...while Katy Perry is gorgeous and I did once mistake her for Zooey Deschanel when I saw her on TRL yesterday, Lily's got a track record like few other women, no? If you care to read a much funnier, far more sarcastic take on this "Kat" fight (hahahaha...), head over to the 'Gum and read your asses off. This is Erika, signing off. Thank you and goodbye.

Deuces,
Erika

Winehouse In Lisbon

Oh dear. Amy Winehouse's performance in Lisbon. Draw your own conclusions. Here's a marker and some construction paper.



What would Pete Doherty say about this. Probably, "Good on ya, mate!" I don't know. I just like that British saying.

Deuces,
Erika

Shomer Shabbas

It's, er, Sunday, last time I checked, and there's nothing to do. You know, like that song..."easy like Sunday morning"...hmmm, whatev. Anyways, since news is slow, the Sartorialist hasn't posted anything new, the Long Blondes' new album isn't really worth talking about, and I've just been eating out of an economy sized bag of Sugar Smacks with the same spoon for 5 days, I'm just gonna kick it casual with a really AWEsome quote.

(de NME)

"It's totally racist. Everyone is just so shocked that I don't like R&B. It's stupid. It's pissing me off."
---Santogold

Awwwww...Santi....The world needs more women like her. Unafraid to stand up and confront social norms while sounding like a thirteen year old.

Snaps for Santogold!

Deuces,
Erika