Cooler Than The Other Side Of The Pillow

Oftentimes people tell me I'm cool. Not in the Fonzie way, since I'm not blessed with the ability to make electrical items work by hitting them with my girly fists. But in the interesting, neat way. And yes, even in this day and age, I still say neat. And awesome, in the 80's after school special way. I call dudes dudes and guy things dude things. Like, this is a dude's shirt or a dude's color or a dude's car. And I still call all girls chicks. And chicks I don't "get" are called broads. I don't see what's so cool about me.

I get referred to as cool on this blog sometimes. Like one person that said she wished she was as cool as I was when she was in high school. Well I'm not in high school anymore, but I'm not sure I was too cool then. Or now, for that matter.

And what's stranger is that the majority of people that think I'm cool don't even read this blog. The Disco has been kept abso hidden from my family, friends, and odd acquaintances for reasons that are obvi. They still find what I have to say, what I do, how I think...awesome cool. My roommates told me I was really cool. I told them bashfully, "Oh, I'm really not very interesting, I promise."

Perhaps it is because I play the drums. Maybe because I was in a riot grrrl band named after an obscure Great Gatsby reference. Or since I used to work at a radio station. Perhaps it is because I still wear my caps backwards, do the "Peace Up, A-Town Down" sign to dudes I know. Or because I can handle my alcohol, keep it real before it goes wrong, beat my boyfriend at wrestling, watch every television show and still recall individual details from respective seasons, or because I once sewed my own skirt and then wore it to school. Maybe it's because I still collect vinyl, own Anime movies, maintain the belief that plaid and stripes don't have to match, they just have to "go", can quote lines from Clueless, The Godfather, Breakfast at Tiffany's, and The Way We Were. Or due to the fact that I collect the same kinds of earrings in every color, re-use Tic Tac boxes for pencil lead and chocolate boxes for accessories, collaged my lighter, hang my necklaces on nails in the wall, can make fried apples (decently), have a laugh like a black Fran Drescher, and can totally talk like Lois in Family Guy.

But none of this equals cool to me. It's just me, being normal boring me. Cool to me is like chicks who can just get out there and do shit, awesome shit, without giving a shit. See how many times I said shit? A chick's radness is directly proportional to how many times you can say shit to describe what she does. A badass, cool chick to me, is like Stephanie Luke AKA Rusty Coathanger (she's the one with black sunglass btw), from the awesome sauce ATL band the Coathangers. Or Karen O. Or the Missbehave girls. Or Jemina Pearl from Be Your Own Pet (RIP), or Suzi Quatro. Women that can go down in the history books as being cool as shit.

So I can't be that cool. Plus in the future kids won't read textbooks, so it's pointless.

Deuces,
Erika