Tuesday, September 16, 2008

And You'll Love What You Lose...

Today, after I got out of my Religious Studies class, things were sweet! Even though I almost fell dead asleep in that class (like always), my professor wrapped things up early and I got to get home twenty minutes before I normally do. So I made a late lunch. (I'm at school from 12:30 to 3:15 so I don't get time for a REAL lunch. Did you get that joke V? It was that Desperate Housewives of NYC thing I was telling you about. Nevermind. The joke is lame now.)

I had finished preparing myself lunch - grilled cheese and alphabet soup, the meal of champions - when the A/C kicked on. It gets pretty cold in this apt so I went to my room to get a sweater and that's where IT happened.

My roomie Melissa's friend Cindy is over. Everything in my room looks normal. I smile at Melissa. Cindy says to me, "Hey, do you mind if I read your magazine?"

Nylon? Sure. Whatevs. Cosmo? Go ahead! I'll give it to you. Elle? Eh...I guess. Under the Radar? Where did you find that? But she isn't holding any of those.

As she's asking me this very simple, easy to answer question, I see she's holding my brand new copy of Missbehave.


Not only does that mean she took it off my desk without even thinking to ask me, but she's just flipping through it nonchalantly like things are cool as a pool! I falter, try to tell her that magazine isn't an ordinary one...I can't put it into words, so all I say is:

"Oh...you're already holding it...Um, I guess, but be very careful with it. It only comes out four times a year and it's sort of special. And I had to go to the Promenade to get it."

She shrugs, says alright, and then Melissa asks what kind of magazine it is. I can't put that into words either. There's so much super mega ultra awesome-ness going on that I can't say it in a few succinct sentences. I mumble:

"It's like a modern women's magazine. These ladies in New York put it out four times a year." FAIL! The one time I could possibly convert a chick to the dark side/testfy! and I ruin it. So sheepishly, I put on my sweater and shuffle out into the living room so I can eat/watch some Bravo.

Cable is a godsend. Roommates are not.



MACK said...

I had the SAME problem a few days ago. My new copy was on my desk, and one of my friends (a guy) picked it up and starts TEARING through the pages looking for the santogold interview. I calmly looked at him and said: "Wali, if you mess my magazine up, I will slit your throat". He started laughing and then stopped when he realized I was so serious. I brought the mag to my magazine publishing class for a project and these girls were like: "I've never heard of it, what kind of magazine is is?" ect. ect. ect. I had such a hard time telling them; its a lifestyle. you just have to read it and relate or keep it moving. i told them about the Missbehave guide to promiscuity and one girl stared at me with this look like, "UGH. Cosmo is so much classier". Riiiiiight. Because

lolitahazed said...

I'm so, so anal about my magazine collection. I probably feel the exact same way as you do-- touch my Nylons, go ahead, but keep your grimy, unpure hands off my Missbehave! You'll crunch the corners! You'll smash the pages! You'll get greasy fingerprints all over the flawlessly glossy cover!

Valentina said...

Haha, I get it now dude! Oh man, if anyone ever tried to read my missbehave I think I might start to cry and than grab the magazine out of their hands. Actually I'd do that with any of my magazines. I'm extremely protective of my possessions. Blame having older siblings who would steal/trash all your shit.

laura bee said...

I feel you. Old roommate ran her wheely computer chair over mine once, turning the cover into a wrinkled mess and i nearly wet myself.