Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Boys I Love: Demetri Martin

Okay, I've decided that the Atlas Shrugged feature isn't such a hot idea. Mostly 'cos it was just a stupid idea in the first place. That's the beauty of retrospection, I suppose. So I figured I would talk about a universal subject: BOYZ (how many, how many?)

WELL, I do really like boys. And I know what they like. They like me. (Anyone catch that reference? Riiiiight...) So I thought I would start a feature that acknowledges the sexy mans I secretly wanna love on. And by love on, I mean lock in a basement, tie to the radiator, free only to have amazing sex con me or create some kind of entertainment in the hopes of being released from my crazy captive clutches, and feed only foods that would ensure their sexiness would never fade (read: Mike & Ike's, chocolate, wine spritzers...).

This post is all about Demetri Martin.

Firstly, he is hawt. And he is smart. He has a haircut like the kids from Village of the Damned. He lives in NYC (makes me very angy/totally jelz of those NY bitches!). A long time ago, Demetri was doing stand-up and filming it. I have his second movie, Person, on tape. It reins. The cutest thing he does is laugh/rub his nose a la Jimmy Fallon. Don't get me wrong, though. Unlike Mr. Fallon, Demetri is hella funny. You will see that in the video I've provided below. He makes up imaginary creatures and has amazing musical talent. You know, Demetri can play the guitar, piano, harmonica, and foot bells. Once, he played them at the same time. Yep. For serious.

If you come in contact with Mr. Martin, kidnap him and hold him hostage. He will entertain you with his cute homemade charts and drawings, and you will be fulfilled. You're welcome.

Demetri's webisite.

Mr. Martin's myspace.