Monday, June 23, 2008

Nope. Not Okay. Not Even A Little. Yep. Nope.

I do not like Pete Wentz. Those who come in close contact with me on a mildly daily basis know this. Last Halloween I got into a discush with two chicks I happened to meet while waiting for MIA to show up for an in-store signing at Criminal and I told them I thought Pete Wentz was "a dick with a body." That shit is verbatim, son. And I stand by it.

Needless to say, I also hate MTV. If it wasn't for America's Best Dance Crew and Next (guilty pleasure, mos def), I wouldn't give that channel the time of day. But I do occasionally watch it, but not for the music, of which there is now none.

It's been like twenty years since there's been music on MTV. I have accepted it. It's okay, okay? Listening, MTV? We're on civil terms as long as the balance you've struck is carefully maintained. Your attempts at music have been few and far between and that's okay. MTV2 is alright with me. I don't know why, but something about it feels slightly alternative. Look, it's cool and that's how we'll leave it.

But why, oh why, MTV would you combine the two most unnecessary things about you (Wentz and music) in hour long block form? What the hell is this? FNMTV? I get it, it's cute. Ahahahaha. I'm laughing. You hear it?

This FNMTV thing, a study in stupidity, is hosted by Wentz, featured the new Vampire Weekend vid, and had commentary by Katy Perry and some passively pretentious music journalist. The show even lets you (sad fatty on couch wannabe music journ), review what you see. Like this girl. She knows things. Music is the new Bono. Lil Wayne ain't.

This is a problem. This is just not going to work out. I don't want to see new cutting-edge vids on MTV. There are other places I can go for that, like the Internet.

In the meantime, MTV, stick to what you're good at: being a vehicle for reality telewhores and geeky highschoolers that want to become hip hop rappers.